Tips to Survive Cross Examination
There are many nerve-wracking parts of the litigation process because many parts of it can be unpredictable. One of the most common questions we get when preparing client’s for trial is, “does my ex’s lawyer get to ask me questions?” The answer is yes. Anytime you testify in court, the other side will be provided with the chance to “cross examine” you. The primary purposes of this are to undermine your allegations and challenge your credibility to make your soon to be ex-spouse’s position in the case look better to the judge.
The next questions that usually follow are: “What can I expect?” and “How should I prepare?”
What to Expect:
In family law, it is typically going to be pretty clear what topics are highly contested in the case. Are there co-parenting issues? Is a child experiencing a specific issue at the moment? Is one spouse asking for alimony when the other doesn’t want to pay it? Is one spouse alleging there is an extensive amount of non-marital property while the other thinks everything is marital?
Once you analyze the case for top priority issues, you should prepare to answer questions about the specific of those issues or events by reviewing documents and discussing those topics with your attorney.
How to answer those questions:
The best way to answer cross examination questions is to stay calm and simply answer the question before you. That sounds simple but can be more challenging than you think.
- Stay calm
Court can be highly emotional. Most litigants have never testified before, let alone been inside of a courthouse. It is normal to be nervous and, especially in family law cases, emotional about the subject (i.e. your marriage and/or your children) you are talking about. On top of this, opposing counsel is not going to be your friend. While they are professionals, their job is to try and illicit unfavorable testimony from you so they will not be asking questions to you as nicely as your own attorney.
Given the highly emotional subject matter, the nerves at play, and the demeanor of opposing counsel, it is easy to respond to cross examination questions with anger or defensively. However, the best thing you can do it stay extremely calm and answer in a “matter-of-fact” way. If the questions are about children, you also want to use child-focused and co-parenting friendly language.
When you do not outwardly react negatively to the things you are asked, the judge is more likely to think your responses are credible.
- Answer the question in front of you
It is easy to over-explain yourself when you feel attacked, and cross examination feels like an attack. However, over-explaining can open the door for opposing counsel to ask more questions of you. The more limited a response, the less they have to work with. If your attorney feels like a more long-winded answer is required, they will be able to ask you follow up questions after cross examination called “re-direct” where you will then be able to explain whatever you need to.
The key here is to make sure your answer is responsive to the question without getting down a rabbit hole.
While there are no guarantees that can be made in a courtroom, if you follow the tips above you will at least have a headstart.
